The perfect woman

According to Uncyclopedia, the prfect woman should meet these conditions:

* The perfect woman... must be very, very beautiful by most standards.
* The perfect woman... must be taller then most men, including the tall ones. And then must be able to shrink perceptibly to that of a short woman for those men that desire soft and cute women should the situation arise.
* The perfect woman... must have an eight inch waist.
* The perfect woman... must have PERFECT legs that are long, skinny, silky forever.
* The Perfect woman... must be able to wear heels on the regular bases, preferably heels that are over 6 inches in height and under 2 centimeters in diameter.
* The perfect woman... must be smart, but pretend to be dumb.
* The perfect woman... must not hesitate to ojectify herself.
* The perfect woman... must be physically and socially between 18 and 30 years old, like forever.
* The perfect woman... must have a vagina and a X chromosome.
* The perfect woman... must seem to be careless when she sees males in trouble and show at least some sign of sadism.
* The perfect woman... must enjoy sex at least as much as her significant other.
* The perfect woman... must be willing to engage in sexual activity with other women.
* The perfect woman... must never have a period.
* The perfect woman... must be able to cook well.
* The perfect woman... must have a sense of humor.
* The perfect woman... must be able to carry me gingerly around in a sack.
* The perfect woman... must have impossibly large boobs